4.23.2009

MEANWHILE:


Back at the Mall of Justice...!


AQUAMAN BUYS SOME 9 VOLT BATTERIES!

BATMAN SHOPS AROUND FOR THE BEST PRICE FOR A NEW VCR!

WONDER WOMAN WAITS IN LINE AT ARTHUR TREACHER'S FISH 'N CHIPS!

THE FLASH BUYS NEW SHOES!

SUPERMAN HANGS OUT IN THE GAP RIGHT NEXT TO THE DRESSING ROOM!

BLACK LIGHTNING CONSIDERS SWITCHING TO A NEW CELLPHONE PLAN!

APACHE CHIEF IS DRUNK IN THE PARKING LOT!

THE WONDER TWINS GO TO VICTORIA'S SECRET. TOGETHER. THAT'S...ACTUALLY PRETTY CREEPY!

ROBIN IS SMOKING BY THE ENTRANCEWAY WITH SOME UNSAVORY FOLKS!

HAWKMAN SEARCHES FRANTICALLY FOR THE PAC SUN!

GREEN LANTERN PLAYS MARVEL VS CAPCOM IN THE ARCADE FOR 3 HOURS!

BRAINIAC SIGNS UP FOR A CHANCE TO WIN A NEW CAR!

WENDY AND MARVIN CONTINUE TO BE USELESS!

VIXEN RUNS UP THE DOWN ESCALATOR!

LEX LUTHOR AND SOLOMON GRUNDY GET NICKED FOR SHOPLIFTING CDS FROM SAM GOODYS!

BOOSTER GOLD BUYS SOME DIPPIN' DOTS!

GREEN ARROW EATS A SANDWICH AND FLIRTS WITH HIGH SCHOOL GIRLS!

ORACLE IS BEING STARED AT BY SMALL CHILDREN!

PLASTIC MAN BUYS A CUSTOM AIRBRUSHED TSHIRT OF BART SIMPSON WITH DREADLOCKS!

HAWKGIRL BEATS UP THE WOMAN WHO SPRAYS HER WITH A PERFUME SAMPLE!

BLACK CANARY DEMANDS A REFUND ON HER FULLSCREEN DVD!

NIGHTWING ATTEMPTS TO RETURN A SWEATER WITHOUT A RECEIPT!

THE QUESTION AND THE HUNTRESS MAKEOUT IN THE BACK HALLWAY!

ZATANNA BUYS A NEW HAT AT H&M!

GORILLA GRODD PLAYS WITH THE KITTIES AT THE PET STORE!

DONNA TROY STILL DOESN'T GET THE APPEAL OF JUICY COUTURE!

BLUE BEETLE KEEPS LOOKING IN WALDENBOOKS BUT DOESN'T BUY ANYTHING!
alternate: BLUE BEETLE APPLIES FOR A JOB AT HOT TOPIC!

MAXWELL LORD BECOMES VERY CROSS WITH AN UNHELPFUL EMPLOYEE AT AMERICAN EAGLE!

GUY GARDNER SHOPS AT THE LEATHER STORE FOR A NICE BELT!

ORION GETS IN A FIGHT OUT FRONT OF RADIOSHACK AND IS KICKED OUT OF THE MALL!

DARKSEID ENJOYS A CINNAMON SUGAR PRETZEL!

GLEEK GETS DETAINED BY ANIMAL CONTROL FOR EBOLA CONTAMINATION!

JASON TODD SPENDS OVER $12 TRYING TO WIN A STUFFED RABBIT FROM A CRANE MACHINE!

MARTIAN MANHUNTER THOUGHT THERE WAS A CINNABON HERE, BUT IT MUST HAVE CLOSED OR SOMETHING!

LADY SHIVA CAN'T FIND THAT TOP IN HER SIZE!

IMPULSE SPENDS TWO HOURS MAKING A MIXED BAG OF JELLYBELLYS IN MISTER BULKYS!

JOHN STEWART JUST HAD HIS CREDIT CARD DECLINED!

MISTER MIRACLE PLAYS GUITAR IN THE PARKING LOT FOR QUARTERS!

R'AS AL GHUL BUYS A FABULOUS COUCH AT POTTERY BARN!

SUPERGIRL LOOKS THROUGH THE CLEARANCE RACK IN MACYS!

POWER GIRL FINDS A USED SEGA DREAMCAST AT GAMESTOP!

CAPTAIN ATOM CAN'T GET IN TO SEE WATCHMEN BECAUSE HE LEFT HIS ID AT HOME!

SPEEDY DOES HEROIN IN THE MENS ROOM!

THE JOKER BUYS A NICE FRAMED PRINT OF THE KRAMER PORTRAIT AT THE FRAME STORE!

WALLY WEST CAN'T DECIDE BETWEEN SARKU JAPAN AND CHINESE WOK!

ETRIGAN IS ANGRY THAT F.Y.E. IS SOLD OUT OF PEARL JAM'S "TEN"!

and then they all went home and had chocolate milkshakes.

contributions from nicholasreed, newageamazon, thebeak
Yes, sometimes twitter leads to ridiculousness.

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1.12.2009

My Year In Lists


As promised previously, here is my mythical and always highly anticipated Best of the Year lists!!!!

(The extra exclamation points are there to emphasize my complete awesomeness.)

Now, normally, I would expound at length on each entry of each list, or at the very least on the choice for number one. As it stands, though, I am loathe to do so at this time, because I can't quite verbally quantify my feelings for some of the entrants on these here ladders of excellence. And so, I expound not at all. (Except here, because that is how I roll. Deal with it, America!)

In any event, these are my favorites of this past Year of Someone's Lord, Two-Thousand and Eight. Notice I do not say "Greatest" or "Best", because one's mileage may vary. (Though why anyone would think to disagree with me, I'll never know. I am right and good in all things. Like Ghandi.)

So yes, so anyway, here's a list of things. Links where appropriate. Maybe a picture. Enjoy it. Add comments at the end, let's see what some of yours are.

FILMS
  1. The Wrestler
  2. The Dark Knight
  3. Wall-E
  4. Cloverfield (I wrote about this here. You should read it.)
  5. Iron Man

ALBUMS
  1. Los Campesinos! - Hold On Now, Youngster... / We Are Beautiful, We Are Doomed (They put out two full albums this year. I'm counting both, as both are amazing, though each has a slightly different feel.)
  2. Thrice - The Alchemy Index, vol 3 & 4: Air & Earth
  3. the Killers - Day and Age
  4. Death Cab for Cutie - Narrow Stairs
  5. Stars - Sad Robots EP
  6. Okkervil River - The Stand-Ins
  7. Atmosphere -When Life Gives You Lemons, You Paint That Shit Gold
  8. Paddy's Well - First Friday (this is my dad's band!)
  9. Alkaline Trio - Agony & Irony
  10. Amanda Palmer - Who Killed Amanda Palmer?

SONGS (links lead to downloadable versions of the songs. I cannot guarantee the links will last forever.)
  1. Baskervilles - "A Little More Time"
  2. the Decemberists - "Valerie Plame"
  3. Los Campesinos! - "We Are Beautiful, We Are Doomed"
  4. Okkervil River - "Calling and Not Calling My Ex"
  5. Chairlift - "Bruises"
  6. the Killers - "Spaceman"
  7. Ben Folds - "You Don't Know Me (feat. Regina Spektor)"
  8. Alkaline Trio - "Help Me"
  9. Amanda Palmer - "Astronaut (A Short History Of Nearly Nothing)"
  10. Los Campesinos! - "Broken Heartbeats Sound Like Breakbeats"

COMICS (specific issues highlighted): creative team
  1. Casanova Vol 2. (issue #14): Matt Fraction, Fabio Moon
  2. All-Star Superman (issue #10): Grant Morrison, Frank Quitely
  3. Pax Romana (4 issue miniseries): Jonathan Hickman
  4. Final Crisis (issue #5): Grant Morrison, JG Jones, Carlos Pacheco
  5. Aetheric Mechanics (a graphic novella): Warren Ellis, Gianluca Pagliarani

TELEVISION
  1. The Venture Brothers season 3
  2. Doctor Who season 4
  3. The Venture Brothers season 3
  4. ok, so I don't watch a whole lot of television...


So there you go. Comment with your opinions. Otherwise, I'm just going to assume that all my lists are comprehensive and completely correct.

Excelsior! And never forget:

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1.06.2008

In Which I Make a Triumphant Return and Declare Myself Lord and Master of All I Survey

Maybe I should write something in here. I feel neglectful and ashamed at my lack of productivity towards my worshipful masses. (Hi, Mom!) The pop culture landscape has been rife, RIFE I SAY!, with subjects worthy of venom, bile, and excoriation, and yet I have remained silent, content in my place of "Fuck that, I would rather keep (re)reading Douglas Coupland and David Foster Wallace, while the world falls apart around me." Which, admittedly, is a rather ostrich-esque way of dealing with things. But screw you, I am the master of this particular domain (not in the internet "domain name" sense, but that's just splitting rabbits), and I will say WHAT I want, WHEN I want, and NOBODY, you hear me meatball?, is going to tell me otherwise!
.....
Sorry, I went all Master Shake for a second, I needed a space to breathe.

BUT ANYWAY, like I said, there's been a lot that has pissed me off, and I would go into exactly what, but then this would become a fount of negativity, and if there's anything that there is too much of on the internet, it's porn. Followed by cat pictures. Then negativity. And I'd like to think that, today, in this rather expansive and (some might say rarely) jolly mood that I am in, I'd like to balance that equation with some positivity. So, without further ado (ok, maybe SOME ado), I will write on what my favorite things of the past Year of Their Lord Two Thousand and Seven are. Bear in mind, this is just one lone (handsome intelligent and awesome) man's opinion, and that it might not necessarily agree with yours. In that case, leave a comment, telling me I'm wrong and why, and then fuck off and start your own blog.* But yes, favorite things, here we go:

Favorite Movie of 2007:
HOT FUZZ
Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg are awesome. That could be the only sentence in this section, and it would still be a perfect encapsulation of why I love this film. They have made two almost perfect films now, Shaun of the Dead and this one, and also produced previously the great BBC series Spaced, and I am now willing to follow them everywhere they go. I mean, jeez, even their contribution to Grindhouse, the fake trailer for a British horror movie Don't!, was genius.

Hot Fuzz was a note-perfect parody of the distinctly American genre of "Buddy Cop" action movies, but set in a distinctly non-American setting: a rural village in England. Skewering every cliche and trope that the genre is known for in its first two-thirds, while also playing as a wonderful mystery with elements of the giallo, the movie then takes an abrupt, Adaptation-esque turn, and BECOMES what it was parodying: a thrill-ride action movie. Except this time, the audience is in on the joke, and what would have seemed ridiculous earlier now makes complete sense in the world that Pegg and Wright have established. As full of laughs as Shaun of the Dead (which I maintain is, along with the first Back to the Future, one of the few perfect screenplays**), it's not only the funniest movie of the year, it's one of the best, period.

honorable mentions: Grindhouse, American Gangster, Knocked Up


Favorite Album of 2007:
Motion City Soundtrack - Even If It Kills Me
I wholly reserve the right to change this at some future date, as I am nothing if not capricious about music. But, as of right now, Motion City Soundtrack's latest entry in their catalog of goodness is the number one on my own personal Billboard chart. While not as rough as their earlier work, and without the apologetic air of "I fucked up" of their last album, the pop sheen production on this album, along with the much more... well, not overtly positive, but less mopey lyrics, I suppose?... makes Justin Pierre and company's latest effort the one I keep coming back to out of the albums that have come out this year.

The themes hit the usual for Pierre: love, loss, love lost, but this time, it ends on a good note. His struggles with his chemical dependencies and mental instability have been well-chronicled, both on the previous records and elsewhere, but his new-found sobriety seems to have coincided with a brighter outlook in his love-life, as the songs "It Had to Be You", "Antonia" and the title track evidence. The stand out track to me, though, is number 4, "Last Night", if only for the bridge section, which contains the lines "My body aches, it heaves it shakes / all somersaults for so-called art. And I still don't know exactly who I am / I never will, amen." No one knows exactly who they are, and it takes a very strong person to admit that. This album is a great accomplishment for the band, and a stand-out for the year in general.

Honorable mentions: Radiohead - In Rainbows, Sundowner - Four One Five Two, Say Anything - In Defense of the Genre


Favorite Book of 2007:
The Gum Thief by Douglas Coupland
Douglas Coupland is a writer I have been following since high school. To give a better picture of that statement: the only other writers who also fall in that category are William Gibson and JRR Tolkien. My reading taste has changed... not drastically, but has... I suppose the phrase would be "been refined" since then. And yet, Coupland remains. He endures. And this year, he put out one of his best novels since Girlfriend in a Coma (which is in my top 5 all-time).***

Honorable mentions: Crooked Little Vein by Warren Ellis, Rant by Chuck Palahniuk, I am America (And So Can You) by Stephen Colbert


Favorite Comic/Graphic work of 2007:
The Nightly News by Jonathan Hickman

This one was the hardest for me to decide, because there was quite a few great things to choose from this year. And it was made even harder by how much OLDER things I read this year, which confused in my head what came out when, and so forth. As it stand, Jonathan Hickman's mini-series from Image, The Nightly News, keeps popping out in my head as the one. The very distinct art style, and very "controversial" subject matter, kept me interested and involved through it's running time.****

Honorable mentions: LoEG: the Black Dossier by Alan Moore and Kevin O'Neill, Casanova by Matt Fraction and Gabriel Ba/Fabio Moon, Fell by Warren Ellis and Ben Templesmith

___________________________________________

SO. Yes. I will be writing in here more. So, check back... I dunno, a lot. There'll eventually be more posts. And they will be fun. And full of awesome. Much like me!


* Make sure to link to me, and tell me, and then we'll have a circle of disagreement. It'll be AWESOME.

** I'll probably do an entire post on my views on this in the future.

*** More info coming.

**** More info coming.

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4.28.2007

Mister Miracle.



As the God of Escaping, Mister Miracle (alias Scott Free) is the master of Escapology bar none, aided by vastly superior technology, including the sentient computer Motherbox. He is the keeper of the Anti-Life Equation, and possesses the will power not to use it.

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11.05.2006

V for Vendetta: anarchy vs. democracy


Dystopian futures in fiction often spring from conflict in society. Whether consciously or not, the writer taps into some vein of discontent and dissatisfaction that runs through the culture of the time and translates it into a skewed vision of the future. Often, this results in a vision of a totalitarian or authoritarian government, and the conflict that ensues from the struggle between concepts such as "personal freedom" and "security." V for Vendetta, written by Alan Moore with art by David Lloyd, is no exception to this. First published in the early 1980's, it was originally released in serialized "chapters" in Warrior, a UK magazine, and later picked up for re-release by the American publisher DC Comics. DC has since collected the entirety of the story in a trade paperback that is released under its "Vertigo" imprint, which is used for such non-superhero (and mature reader oreinted) works such as Neil Gaiman's Sandman and Preacher. In 2005, an adaptation was filmed for Warner Brothers studios (who own DC Comics) co-written and produced by Larry and Andy Wachowski, creators of the Matrix trilogy, and directed by James McTeigue. Released to theaters in March 2006 in the US, the adaptation was number one at the box office for its first weekend, and is generally considered to be a successful release financially.


The problems of adaptation arise when one attempts to translate a work from one format into another; in this case, from serialized sequential graphic art (or "comic book" form, as it is widely known) into a film format. The nature of the comic form brings with it unique problems from that of straight prose novels. The art of the piece lends itself to a very visual syle, which can benefit a filmmaker attempting to adapt it, as the "heavy lifting" of designing a visual look is done. But a large part of some comics (V for Vendetta included) is the juxtapostion of images on the page and the placement of the images within the individual panels. This is something that is less easily translated to film. Another of Alan Moore's works, Watchmen, which is considered by many critics and fans to be the Citizen Kane of comics, makes use of symbolic imagery and symmetry within the panel grid which would be impossible to translate onto film in any way. This is in addition to the normal problems of adaptation: anachronisms related to the time written versus the time filmed, plot points which work in a long form novel but which must be excised or compressed in a two-plus hour film, and themes which relate to the work as originally written but may not relate to the adaptor's view of what the work means. All these are in evidence in V for Vendetta the film, and all work to slightly change the meaning behind the story from that which Alan Moore originally intended.


One of the immediate changes made is that the film opens with a recreation and explanation of the Gunpowder Plot perpetrated by Guy Fawkes. The character of V's look, in both book and film, is supposed to be reminiscent of Fawkes, down to the mask he wears be a Guy Fawkes mask, so the sequence is not entirely out of place. The movie was made for American audiences, most of whom are not familiar with the legend of Guy Fawkes, and thus the connection between his actions (a plot to blow up Parliament) and V's planned actions is explicitly stated. The problem with this is that V's character in the book is NOT Fawkes-like, other than in his explosion of Parliament. In the book, V is an anarchist. He states as much, declaring his love of anarchy in a scene not in the movie, where he has a "conversation" with a statue of the lady Justice. He has a full back and forth dialogue with himself, representing both his own person and Justice, his former love, which culminates in his revelation that "there's someone else now . . . Her name is Anarchy and she has taught me more as a mistress than you ever did!" (Moore 40-41) He then leaves a small package, looking like the traditional heart-shaped box of chocolates, at the foot of the statue, which subsequently explodes. The last panel of the page is a close-up of V turning to the "camera", and saying "The flames of freedom. How lovely. How just.
Ahh, my precious Anarchy . . . 'O beauty, 'til now I never knew thee.'" (Moore 41) The end quote comes from Shakespeare's Henry VIII, act i, sc. iv. In his series of essays on the adaptation of V for Vendetta to film, Peter Sanderson refers to an interview with Moore where he stated "'I was just using Guy Fawkes as a symbol, without really any references to the historical Guy Fawkes. It was the bonfire night Guy Fawkes I was referencing, with the at the time easily available Guy Fawkes masks.'" Sanderson than goes on to state that "In Moore's series Fawkes thus becomes a symbol. If the fascists have taken over England, and the government has become the enemy, then Fawkes, the enemy of the government, becomes a freedom fighter. V impersonates a villain of British history, thus taking on the role of the devil, to fight for a noble cause." The film's connecting Fawkes so blatantly to V is thus not something intended by the text. In addition, the deletion of the Lady Justice scene from the story, and thus eliminating V's declared love of anarchy, takes out of the story one of the reasons V gives for blowing up Parliament, which is, as stated by Peter Sanderson, that "V seems to be arguing that this version of Justice has forfeited his allegiance by becoming linked with totalitarian rule; that is how he justifies blowing up the statue and the Old Bailey." The symbols of the old system (Parliament, the Old Bailey, Downing Street) must be torn down and destroyed, as does the system itself.


Another change, seemingly small, made to the text by the filmmakers is the age of Evey Hammond, the main protagonist, other than V, who is played by Natalie Portman in the movie. In the beginning of the book, Evey is 16, and attempting to solicit herself as a prostitute, as her income as a ward of the state is too meager to live on and she sees no other way to make money. Her naievety is apparent, as the first person she approaches turns out to be a "Fingerman," or policeman. The man, with his associates (also Fingermen), attempts to assault Evey, until she is rescued by V, who dispatches the men, including killing one with an explosive device, all while quoting Shakespeare's Macbeth. This begins V's arc of teaching, torturing, and training Evey, to the point that by the end of the book, she has taken his place willingly, in dress if not in method, and thus completes the book's statement of V as a symbol, undying and perpetually moving through history. She rejects V's passion for violence and death, but embraces his cause of anarchy and self-guidance. The movie, though, moves Evey's age up a few years, making her in her early twenties. She works at a television station, and is, while not well off, living well enough to have her own apartment. She leaves her apartment to meet Gordon, a television personality, for a date, in defiance of the curfew that covers London. She is stopped by Fingermen, and the scene unfolds much like the scene from the book. The change of Evey's age means that, in the words of Marc Singer from his essay "V and Virtuality," "Evey is a more adult character now . . . more mature, less vulnerable, and not especially looking for a father figure anymore; she never quite helps V in any premeditated way (until the very end), even working against him at one point in a vain attempt to pry herself out of his clutches." Whereas Evey in the book is vulnerable, and a mess psychologically (not helped by V's tactics and treatment of her through the story), looking for guidance, Evey in the movie is going along just to get along. As Singer says, "that greater confidence means Evey can reject V in no uncertain terms after his worst crimes are revealed. This is more morally palatable for us and better for Evey, but it's worse for the plot as it means she never sticks around to learn the tricks of V's trade, or to denounce his methods once she does." The implication throughout the film (and in one scene, stated plainly) is that Evey loves V in a romantic way, one which is less muddled with abandonement and father issues. Whether this was a natural extension of the story that the filmmakers saw as necessary, or a concession to the American audiences apparent need for a love story in every film, one may never be sure.


As just stated, Evey in the movie is not shown to be carrying on V's legacy as an individual symbol. This spot is taken by the crowd scene towards the end of the film, where the people of the city are shown marching to Parliament wearing the Guy Fawkes masks, wigs, hats, and capes which are identical to V's. This scene is not in the book, and in fact the book has the people of the city taking part in a violent anarchic riot orchestrated by V as a crucible to turn London into the true anarchic society he sees as ideal. This change is enormous, and is fact shifts the focus of V's vendetta, plot and victory from that of a society based in anarchy to a reformed democracy. Towards the end of the book, when all of V's machinations near their climax, he leads Evey on one final tour through his home, the Shadow Gallery, all while discussing anarchy and its aims. "Anarchy wears two faces, both Creator and Destroyer," he says, "Thus Destroyers topple empires; make a canvas of clean rubble where Creators can then build a better world. Rubble, once achieved, makes further ruins' means irrelevant." This speech underscores V's view of anarchy as a creating element. V, in his pirate broadcast on the television station earlier in the book, castigates the people of England for bowing to the government for so long, and thus makes the anarchic riot justified, as in his view, it is the people taking back what was taken from them. The Chancellor, Adam Susan, is assassinated by a common person, a woman whose husband was actually killed by V. Thus is born a society based in anarchic principles, one in which elements are torn down, only to be rebuilt as better from within, which is carried through the end, where the people of London riot and overthrow the
fascist government which has oppressed them. We are never shown the end results, or the after-effects, as the book ends with the riot still in progress. The implication (or hope of V, rather) is that a self-governing society results, with every man representing himself. The film, though, has a different message. The Chancellor, Adam Sutler (played by John Hurt, in what must be a conscious parallel to his role in 1984), is killed by one of his own men, in a situation set up and witnessed by V. As said in an essay on V for Vendetta on the Howling Curmudgeons blog, "That's a reasonably significant difference, because it tends to say that an evil government's undoing is itself, with the result that you don't need to act, you can just wait." The masks and costumes worn by the crowd at the end of the film were sent out by V to the people, reinforcing this view that the change comes from elsewhere, not from within the self. The people can choose to act or not, yes, but the idea to do so came from elsewhere, and was orchestrated and takes place whether those people who received the costumes marched or not. The fact that they chose to en masse is irrelevant; V's pirate broadcast (fairly intact in the film) still applies, as the people have just supplanted one leader symbol (the fascist Norse Fire government) with another (V). The film ends on a note of hope, with the destruction of Parliament and the hopeful looks on the faces of Evey and Finch (a policeman who's arc in the book mimics V's, but in the movie is just V's opposite number of sorts), but it is a false hope, as the same uncertainty which is within the book's ending is prevalent in the film as well, just without the real change of the riot and power struggle taking place in London in the book.


These small changes effect the story in large ways, and there are many changes which have gone unstated as well. The target audiences of the book and film are slightly different, and the time in which each were written are of definite influence. The original serialized form of the book was written in 1981, and, as Moore states in his introduction to the graphic novel collection, "the historical background of the story proceeds from a predicted Conservative defeat in the 1982 General Election . . . It's 1988 now. Margaret Thatcher is entering her third term of office and talking confidently of an unbroken Conservative leadership . . . It's cold and it's mean spirited and I don't like it here anymore." The book was written in an environment of oppressive government and near fascism, which lends itself to the setting and feeling the story evokes. On the other hand, the film was made by American filmmakers in 2005, with the Republican government in charge of the US constantly redefining the powers of the presidency and getting the country engulfed in wars over abstract ideas and false promises. As film reviewer Devin Faraci of Chud.com says in his essay on the film, "It's shocking that a film like V for Vendetta, in which the hero can be described in no other terms but terrorist, has been made by a major movie studio, which is itself a part of a major, world-dominating corporation." The labeling of V as a terrorist in the film is a very deliberate usage, meant to evoke images of 9/11 and Al Quaeda in the minds of viewers, and the fact that V is, in most ways, justifiable in his actions can challenge people to perhaps rethink their views of those we automatically label as "enemies." This is where the film succeeds in its depiction. The book is about the triumph of anarchy over oppressive order. The film is about the power of the people's voice over the voice of the few in power, as exemplified by what is seen by many as the film's tagline: "People should not be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of their people."

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9.02.2006

All-Star Superman #1-5


All Star Superman! The best book around! Written by the god of all comic writing Grant Morrison, and art from the wonderful Frank Quitely, with beautiful coloring by Jamie Grant, this series is practically everything I want in a comic. The supercompressed pace, the sense of wonder and fun bursting out of every page, the wonderful character moments... this, to me, is the perfect comic. And, to my surprise, it's a Superman story.

As a character, Superman interests me, but never has it been enough to get me to regularly buy a title. Morrison and Quitely have succeeded in getting me onboard, and letting me see WHY Superman is the number one superhero. But the most amazing thing to me is, in issue #4, they made Jimmy Olsen COOL, without it being artificial or goofy. His characterization made complete sense to me; after all, if your pal was the most powerful being on earth, wouldn't that by proxy make you pretty cool? The device of his column being him trying out different lives/personae was also a wonderful nod to the Silver Age Jimmy Olsen stories, where he would get into some outlandish mess in every issue.


Another thing I think this series has nailed is the VISIBLE difference between Clark Kent and Superman. John Byrne, in his Man of Steel revamp, wrote that there is a visible difference between the two in terms of posture and mannerisms, but did not show it in his artwork for the series. Here, Quitely draws Clark as hunched over constantly, and always stumbling and tripping over things (more on this in a bit). When Clark then reveals his identity in the first issue to Lois, there is a very blatant visible transformation from Clark to Superman: he stands up straighter, doesn't fumble his words... it's almost as if you can hear his voice getting deeper and more resonant on the page. Its also visible in issue #2 in the mirror shot, when he slumps down like Clark, but the reflection shows his true "inner Superman". Another facet of this is how Quitely shows Clark's clumsiness as not just a piece of character role-playing on his part, but actually uses it to help people in small ways, like in the first issue he trips and bumps into the old man, thereby saving him from the piece of falling debris. It's touches like this that make the issues immensely rereadable.

Issue #5? AMAZING. This was full of wonderful touches: Lex Luthor as both the anti-Batman (pinnacle of human intellect and strength) and the anti-Superman. Quitely's use of the panel borders in both the stair sequence and when the Parasite crashes through the floor. The eyebrow pencil (set up very early; watch Clark after he saves Lex from electrocution). BiblioBot "boring" through rock. Wow. Just absolutely amazing.


As you can see, I am in love with this title, and wait patiently and excitedly for every issue to be released. I am especially anxious to see more of Morrison's portrayal of Lex Luthor, as I feel Grant has a great handle on him (based on his previous work from JLA: Rock of Ages, and issue #5 of this series). So there you have it. The highest recommendation I could ever give a book. This, in an era of civil wars and infinite crises, Morrison and Quitely have produced a book which is just, plain and simple, fun superhero storytelling. And I love it.

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5.04.2006

5.4.3.2. What are you waiting for?

This is old news (at this point) I know, but I laugh my ass off every time I see anything to do with it. At the annual White House Correspondent's Dinner, Stephen Colbert, America's bastion of Truthiness, delivered the closing address. In a room full of political movers and shakers. Including the President of the United States of America, George W. (Bastard) Bush (Editiorializing is good.) who was sitting RIGHT NEXT TO HIM. And proceeded to deliver a speech which left the audience almost COMPLETELY SILENT IN SHOCK because of how amazing and special he is. Some highlights:
Mr. President, my name is Stephen Colbert and tonight it's my privilege to celebrate this president. We're not so different, he and I. We get it. We're not brainiacs on the nerd patrol. We're not members of the factinista. We go straight from the gut, right sir? That's where the truth lies, right down here in the gut. Do you know you have more nerve endings in your gut than you have in your head? You can look it up. I know some of you are going to say "I did look it up, and that's not true." That's 'cause you looked it up in a book.
Oh, it gets better.

Now, I know there are some polls out there saying this man has a 32% approval rating. But guys like us, we don't pay attention to the polls. We know that polls are just a collection of statistics that reflect what people are thinking in "reality." And reality has a well-known liberal bias. So, Mr. President, please, pay no attention to the people that say the glass is half full. 32% means the glass -- it's important to set up your jokes properly, sir. Sir, pay no attention to the people who say the glass is half empty, because 32% means it's 2/3 empty. There's still some liquid in that glass is my point, but I wouldn't drink it. The last third is usually backwash.

[...]

The greatest thing about this man is he's steady. You know where he stands. He believes the same thing Wednesday that he believed on Monday, no matter what happened Tuesday. Events can change; this man's beliefs never will. As excited as I am to be here with the president, I am appalled to be surrounded by the liberal media that is destroying America, with the exception of Fox News. Fox News gives you both sides of every story: the president's side, and the vice president's side. But the rest of you, what are you thinking, reporting on NSA wiretapping or secret prisons in eastern Europe? Those things are secret for a very important reason: they're super-depressing. And if that's your goal, well, misery accomplished. Over the last five years you people were so good -- over tax cuts, WMD intelligence, the effect of global warming. We Americans didn't want to know, and you had the courtesy not to try to find out. Those were good times, as far as we knew.

Stephen Colbert, I love you.
full transcript of the speech, plus a short "audition" film of him as Press Secretary

Seriously, the man has balls the size of Cinnabons to have given that speech at all in front of a bunch of Republicans, let alone next to the H.N.i.C. Thusly, Stephen, I salute you with what I know you want to see:


Permanent number one spot on my list, man.

IN OTHER NEWS:

This image says a lot about why I love comics

Neil Gaiman + John Romita Jr. + Jack Kirby = love.

The only better equation is Morrison + Quitely = splendor.

(click on the pictures to see them in their full-on amazing glory)

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4.07.2006

Is there any hope for us, or are the rumors true?

This post at Dave's Long Box pretty much covers why I like the Mighty Thor as a character.

"Yea verily, I swear by all that mine father Odin hath wrought upon this goodly earth, I, Thor, shall claim vengeance on thee! Mjolnir, to me!"

(SMASH, BITCHES)

"By Soggoth's horns, this deed is done!"

Yeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, thats the good stuff.

So yeah, I've not been writing in here for a good bit, have I? It's not for lack of writing, you can be sure. I've just not been writing anything worthwhile enough to unleash upon you, my blog-reading enthusiasts. See, I have only YOUR best interests at heart.

I do have a quick CD review for you, though, as I know you've been starved for my attention and crave the fix that only my unique brand of self-deprecation and overblown ego provide. Sic Semper Bea Arthur.

The Lawrence Arms - Oh! Calcutta!


If you know anything about this amazing Chicago punk band, you don't need me to explain how good they are. But seeing as how the only Chicago punk bands most seem to know about are the Alkaline Trio (good) and Fall Out Boy (astoundingly bad), maybe a primer is in order: The last official release from the band was The Greatest Story Ever Told, a concept album based around a circus theme, which also revolved around the comparison between music/entertainment and the conformity of the masses, using massive amounts of both low and high culture references (for instance, in one short chorus, Nabakov, Simon & Garfunkel, Paradise Lost, and the Simpsons are all referenced). Themes both lyrical and musical were repeated and cross-referenced throughout the album, until the final song actually has pieces of every other song contained in it in some way. (Sidenote: interesting comparisons can be made to the "fractal" nature of Grant Morrison's magnum opus The Invisibles here. But that's way too much work for me.)

So, how do they follow that up?

By making what is most definitely one the most aggresively old-school sounding record they've ever done, which, while not as overtly theme-based as the last, is nontheless held together by a thread of discontent and dissatisfaction with the current state of culture in this country. Songs like "The Devil's Takin' Names" and "Are You There, Margaret? It's me, God" do the usual random references the Larry Arms boys regularly make, but there is a palpable anger behind every song, almost tactile in its fierceness. Nowhere is this more evident than on the track "Recovering the Opposable Thumb" (lyrics), which is a scathing indictment of the Intelligent Design theory, and indeed, the concept of using religion as a weapon against thoughtful intelligent discussion in general. All in all, this is an amazing record, and my early vote for album of the year.

Two tracks, and a video for "The Devil's Takin' Names" are on the band's Myspace page.

order the CD from Amazon.

SO yeah.
Great album.

ps. I promise I'll write more in here. As long as someone's reading, I'll be writing.

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3.17.2006

V for Vendetta

a brief movie review:
(***spoilers, duh***)


"Remember, remember the 5th of November, the Gun-Powder Treason and Plot.
I know of no reason, the Gun-Powder Treason, should ever be forgot."


The film is good, but not great, and quite frankly, not V for Vendetta the book at all. It takes some of the main moments from the books and gets there differently, almost like a cliffs notes/cover version. FATE is not existent, the back story of why people were in Larkhill and what they were doing is elaborated upon, most of the subplots have been excised, and the end, while similar in spirit and sentiment, is in some ways VERY different.

What was good: Hugo Weaving, Hugo Weaving, Hugo Weaving. Wow, the man just IS V. The torture scenes with Evey were note-perfect. John Hurt as the Chancellor was suitably full of fire and brimstone and fascism. The movie had its heart in the right place.

What wasn't so good: Natalie Portman's accent. Sorry, baby, I still love you, though. The pacing was slightly... "disjointed", I think is the right word. Some of the changes made seemed arbitrary and clumsy in comparison to the book. Switching the blowing up of Parliament from the beginning to the end might provide a nice climax image, but still seems odd to me. Can't quite figure why. AND the major complaint I have and maybe this is in the book and I just haven't been able to pick up on it, but I recall the "love" between V and Evey being strictly PLATONIC. I don't remember any romantic sentiments from the book, I always have taken it more as a familial type love. Maybe I'm wrong, but it seemed so odd in the movie.

Anyway, overall, a good popcorn picture, with some ideas behind it, which these days is unusual in and of itself. I'd say 3.5 out of 5 stars.

"A revolution without dancing is one hardly worth having at all."

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3.01.2006

Don't let anyone tell you no.

I hate March.

Nothing good has ever happened to me in March. Additionally, an inordinately large amount of BAD things have happened to me in March. (One positive thing: one of my sisters was born in March; though on the same day, Reagan was shot and DIDN'T DIE.)

So forgive me for a smidge of pessimism, but nothing good comes of this month or anything associated with it. In fact, I wish St Patrick's Day wasn't in March, because then I wouldn't have to leave the house for any reason...

ANYWAY.

NextWave #2 came out today. It makes me warm and fuzzy inside. Yes, Warren Ellis is your new personal lord and savior; bring him cigarettes, booze, and whores.

My mind is too frazzled with the thoughts of impending doom from the coming month to concentrate on much of anything, so I'll write something more when I'm not feeling so apocalyptic.

I leave you with a random picture of Scarlett Johansson's breasts:

You're welcome.

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2.03.2006

Return of the (not really a) Jedi.

My computer's harddrive went to sleep sometime around 3am on Tuesday and never woke up. We had a traditional Irish wake for it (ie. I got drunk and staggered around for awhile Tuesday night.)

BUT.

A new computer was purchased Wednesday evening. And if my last computer was Jesus, this one is Buddha, because its like 9000 times better. For a visual representation:

My old computer:
Grant Morrison on New X-men. Better than most things. A solid read, interesting ideas and takes on characters he didn't create, as well as some new ones which are cool too.

My New Computer:
Grant Morrison on The Invisibles. The nature of god and the universe and "life as a game" and anarchy and "You are on the Island" and quantum magic and chaos theory and "Eye youse thee enn emm eee" and fucking brilliance in a three volume series. One of my favorite things ever.

So you see how they compare now. Good. Moving on... I got a new camera/music phone. So I am techno-ed out right now.

In completely different news, Billy Corgan and Jimmy Chamberlain are apparently going to be reuniting and recording as the Smashing Pumpkins. And possibly performing. I don't know how I feel about that. The Pumpkins were my favorite band for a long time (only within the past 2 years have they been overthrown by Jets to Brazil, who are now firmly entrenched), and I'm more than a bit leery of an attempt by Billy to revive them, especially noting the abscence of James Iha. (D'arcy was crap anyway, so I could care less about whether she's in.) We'll see how this develops, I guess. Maybe it'll be good, I don't know.

So yeah. Quick hits: the State of the Union address was laughable, and yesterday Dubya asked for $120 billion more for the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. You know the one in Iraq, right? the one we "won" in 2003? Yeah... anyway... moving on, The new Strokes album, First Impressions of Earth, is really good, much better than their older ones... I watched about half of Brokeback Mountain the other day, and it's not bad or anything, but it's friggin BORING and insanely overpraised... Grant Morrison is god... ummm... what else...

Oh yeah, Modest Mouse's Good News for People Who Love Bad News is a great album to listen to while driving around in 60 degree weather with the windows down.

That is all.

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1.29.2006

a Sunday comic.


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1.27.2006

Info-dump.

Last night, while I was falling asleep masturbating to softcore on cinemax* listening to a Dane Cook cd, an idea came to me about what to write about today: Everyone has random thoughts, right? Just the completely bizarre stuff that you tend to obsess a bit about, and then forget until later. I know I do. So what I'm going to do is compile a list of the topics you'd Google if you had access to my head and wanted to know what the fuck has been running through my mind this week (other than its normal program of fear and loathing). So here we go!

  • Eddie Izzard Sexie double cd. While not as consistently funny as Glorious or Dressed to Kill, and not as gleefully blasphemous as Circle (Blas-phe-my!!! Blas-phe-you!! Blas-phe-everybody in the room!!), Eddie's newest release is still one of the funnier things you will ever listen to that's from a modern stand-up. Sample line from the beginning of the show: "I had breast envy! I didn't have penis envy. I had penis nonchalance."
  • Infinite Crisis. Driving home the point to me that I know way too much about DC comics history (both Pre- and Post-Crisis [the original]), especially since I never read DC when I was younger, and hardly read any non-Morrison DC now. But, on the whole, an enjoyable mini-series that seems to be getting the "universe threatening crossover!!!111!!1!!" thing right. (Unlike House of M, which was teh suck.) Superboy-Prime going ape-shit was pretty cool, actually.
  • Harvey Danger Little by Little... album. I posted about this very briefly before, just to get the word out about it, but the Danger boys released their newest album as a free download on their website. I'd suggest downloading it, because it's an excellent slice of indie-rock and well worth your time. I've been listening to it pretty constantly on my iPod, Motherboxxx, especially while at work.
  • Grant Morrison is the fucking man. Well, duh. Seven Soldiers, All-Star Superman, added atop his already impressive resume of THINGS THAT I LOVE? I am a manwhore for him, in a way your tiny non-5D brains can't even comprehend.
  • NEXTWAVE Did I hype this up enough? FUCK NO. It's even funnier than I thought it was going to be. Deal with it.
  • Sin City. I enjoyed the hell out of this movie, easily my favorite of last year, and while I generally watch the whole thing (I have the Extended Special Edition DVD), there's one section which I love far and away more than the rest:Clive Owen as Dwight is so amazingly bad-ass. I don't have a DVD drive in my computer, otherwise I'd get a screencap of my favorite shot in the movie (him jumping down the manhole, both guns blazing downwards).
  • Driving. Not really pop-culture related or anything, but I'm finding it disturbing how I just zone out when driving to work or class. I literally have no memory of driving these places, unless something unusual happens to make me remember. I get to both places on time, with no accidents or mishaps, but it still weirds me out that I can unconsciously do something as complicated (and let's face it, dangerous) as operating an automobile and not have any memory of it.
  • More Driving. Has anyone else ever thought about what it would be like to swerve into the oncoming traffic, just to see what it would be like....? No, just me? Ok.
  • Insomnia. It leads me to make things like this:Christopher Walken is your new personal lord and savior. He's also running for president. Vote for him. Or don't. It's your choice. But he'll swallow your soul if you don't.
  • Anthropic Principle. Doctrine of quantum physics that states that one explanation for why the universe has the properties we observe is that, were the properties different, it is likely that life would not form and therefore we would not be here to observe the changes. Discuss.
  • Monty Python's Flying Circus. I need to get the DVDs of the episodes, since I am wearing out my VHS tapes through constant watching. My favorite sketch EVER from the show is The Penguin Atop the Television Set. It is pure bizarre genius.
  • I am old. Well, older. And while I have adjusted to this, every so often I get reminded of it, and I curse time and its chronological momentum. Damn you, minutes/hours/years! Damn you all to hell!
Ok, that was fun. I'll have to do this again sometime.


*Actually, it was Showtime.

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1.25.2006

Hooray for today!























G0DLAND tpb and NEXTWAVE #1.

All is right in the world. For now.*




*I promise I will be writing more soon. Just been hitting a writer's block the size of King Kong Bundy lately.

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1.12.2006

...the hell?

I have not been reading Spider-man titles at all, mostly because they haven't interested me one bit since "the Clone Saga" of the late 90's (the less said of THAT, the better). I've kept up on the events in them through Wizard (until a few years ago, when I realized Wizard is crap), and more recently, online blogs and newssites. So, I knew a bit about the current storyline "The Other" going through all the titles. Peter is sick, going to die, big-ass vampire-esque dude tears his eye out and eats it, Pete goes nuts and into a cocoon, attacks vampire man and tears his head off, and apparently... other stuff happened. Like I said, I don't read them.

BUT

Now they're giving him a new costume. I don't know the reasoning behind it, but it doesn't matter, because there are FOUR perfect costumes in super-hero comics that you DON'T FUCK WITH TOO MUCH: Superman, Batman, the Flash, and FUCKING SPIDER-MAN.

ahem.

Sorry, got carried away, but here, witness the monstrosity for yourself:

I hate it. Hate it hate it hate it. It's ugly and stupid and pointless and I hate it. And 5 bucks says it doesn't last a year.

In other brief news, I cut my hair off.

Coming soon: Why every super-hero comic not written by Grant Morrison or Warren Ellis is crap. Watch the fire come out of my ears!!

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1.06.2006

The motherfucking boat is exploding!

One of my secrets I usually don't let people know is that I still read comic books. I don't know why it is necessary to keep it a secret, but there is a certain stigma attached to those who read them. Y'know, basically, its encapsulated by the Comic Book Guy from the Simpsons.


I am, as should be obvious below, not one of them.


Hmm, probably not the best picture to use. Eh, whatever. I'm too lazy to change it now.

My point is that I am not the stereotypical comics fan, nor am I a slavish speculator who buys everything then immediately places them in hermetically sealed bags within climate-controlled longboxes in order to preserve them for eternity. In fact, the few I buy end up in piles after I've read them, in order to be read again at a later date. 'Cause, see, I like to read them.

As a medium, comics have a reputation of being juvenile adolescent power fantasies. And yes, some.. in fact, most, still are. But there is some surprisingly deep and meaningful themes and writing contained in others. See: anything by Alan Moore. And, as always, there is also some kick-ass hyper-science insanity. Mostly thanks to Grant Morrison and Warren Ellis. Which brings me to the point of this entry...

NEXTWAVE is a new series by the aforementioned Mr. Ellis, which looks like most super-hero comics on crystal meth, PCP, and acid at the same time. There's an interview here from the editor of it. There's a press conference interview here with the writer which contains my favorite quote of the moment: "On Sunday I killed someone, and when I left the church, I carved 'NEXTWAVE' into his chest. I hope the papers pick up on that." And it has its OWN FRIGGIN' THEME SONG. Which is catchy as all hell. Can't beat the tagline either: "Nextwave: Healing America by beating people up." Plus, it has a giant dragon named "Fin Fang Foom" in it. That's got to count for something.

And, to summarize:

SO yeah, in conclusion, if you don't like it, don't read it. But eff you if you think I'm not going to. As long as I have the (small amount of required) money and the ability to, I will enjoy my sequential art.

Just, do me a favor.... if I say I'm reading something by Rob Liefeld or Chuck Austen, shoot me. In the head. It'll be for the best.



PS. for further reading, might I suggest The Invisibles by Grant Morrison, about anarchists, metaphysics, drugs, sex, the counter culture, and quantum physics; From Hell by Alan Moore, about the Jack the Ripper murders (and loads better than the movie); and Transmetropolitan by Warren Ellis, about gonzo journalism, pop-culture, and cynicism. All goodness, all love, all the time.

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